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Post by 1221pch on Apr 3, 2015 10:04:57 GMT -5
every club with which i've been involved -- as a parent and a coach -- makes it very clear that you are paying for instruction, not gameday court time. equal practice opportunity is always guaranteed. playing time is never guaranteed. if the majority of people don't understand this -- assuming the majority of clubs do the same thing -- that's on the people, not the clubs. I disagree with this. In many cases, especially younger players--the parents do NOT know. What they know is: *Club is supposed to get my daughter a scholarship *The HS coach says she 'needs' to play club. *Usually, paying more means getting something 'better'. And that's about it. There ARE clubs that take great pains to explain their policies regarding playing time and training. But my experience is that far more make promises to suck people in to get their money. Heck--there are two clubs near here that scare parents by saying if their kids change clubs after starting with a specific one, it'll destroy the girl's chances of a college scholarship. I know that's a Goebbels-sized lie, you know it--but most parents don't. The worst of all this is that the kid's name is out there and 'famous' for a bad reason. Adults (on both sides) have put her in the middle of a fight, the very last thing anyone should want for a child. I thought this thread couldn't get any worse and now you're referencing Joseph Goebbels? Next up..... The Hitler card.
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Post by mikegarrison on Apr 3, 2015 10:28:15 GMT -5
And this is why you should NEVER invite two attorneys to a party. Could be worse. Could be two engineers.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2015 12:33:15 GMT -5
every club with which i've been involved -- as a parent and a coach -- makes it very clear that you are paying for instruction, not gameday court time. equal practice opportunity is always guaranteed. playing time is never guaranteed. if the majority of people don't understand this -- assuming the majority of clubs do the same thing -- that's on the people, not the clubs. I disagree with this. In many cases, especially younger players--the parents do NOT know. What they know is: *Club is supposed to get my daughter a scholarship *The HS coach says she 'needs' to play club. *Usually, paying more means getting something 'better'. And that's about it. There ARE clubs that take great pains to explain their policies regarding playing time and training. But my experience is that far more make promises to suck people in to get their money. Heck--there are two clubs near here that scare parents by saying if their kids change clubs after starting with a specific one, it'll destroy the girl's chances of a college scholarship. I know that's a Goebbels-sized lie, you know it--but most parents don't. The worst of all this is that the kid's name is out there and 'famous' for a bad reason. Adults (on both sides) have put her in the middle of a fight, the very last thing anyone should want for a child. no question some clubs are better at explaining this than others. and i totally am with you re clubs that make promises out of greed &/or ego. i'm just saying that when the club explains this truthfully to parents, and it's in writing on forms that the parents sign, it's incumbent on the parents to read and ask questions before signing. if and when they don't, that's on them. when my daughter made the cut in the mid-90s, the club she played for had a club-wide meeting with all players and parents attending. the very first thing the director said was this: if you're here for an athletic scholarship, you're in the wrong place. you should be in the library instead. look around this room. there are _______ players here (i forget the #). for every 20 of you, only 1 will actually get some athletic $ for college. and for most of those gifted players, it won't be a full ride. i've never forgotten that. and every club i've been associated with, although not necessarily so directly, has given parents the same honest message. so that's been my perhaps very fortunate experience...
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Post by vbman100 on Apr 3, 2015 22:46:00 GMT -5
And this is why you should NEVER invite two attorneys to a party. Could be worse. Could be two engineers. Orpheus and volleyguy reminded me of one of my favorite jokes: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hey, we're both lawyers.
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Post by vbman100 on Apr 3, 2015 22:59:33 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2015 23:44:29 GMT -5
I agree with that. With our club, we note the academic money available compared to athletic--as well as the cost of club (we're on the very inexpensive side of things--the other club in town is pimping families of thousands of dollars...). If it's handed out and in writing--it is absolutely the parents' responsibility and decision. I just don't think that happens with many clubs. I disagree with this. In many cases, especially younger players--the parents do NOT know. What they know is: *Club is supposed to get my daughter a scholarship *The HS coach says she 'needs' to play club. *Usually, paying more means getting something 'better'. And that's about it. There ARE clubs that take great pains to explain their policies regarding playing time and training. But my experience is that far more make promises to suck people in to get their money. Heck--there are two clubs near here that scare parents by saying if their kids change clubs after starting with a specific one, it'll destroy the girl's chances of a college scholarship. I know that's a Goebbels-sized lie, you know it--but most parents don't. The worst of all this is that the kid's name is out there and 'famous' for a bad reason. Adults (on both sides) have put her in the middle of a fight, the very last thing anyone should want for a child. no question some clubs are better at explaining this than others. and i totally am with you re clubs that make promises out of greed &/or ego. i'm just saying that when the club explains this truthfully to parents, and it's in writing on forms that the parents sign, it's incumbent on the parents to read and ask questions before signing. if and when they don't, that's on them. when my daughter made the cut in the mid-90s, the club she played for had a club-wide meeting with all players and parents attending. the very first thing the director said was this: if you're here for an athletic scholarship, you're in the wrong place. you should be in the library instead. look around this room. there are _______ players here (i forget the #). for every 20 of you, only 1 will actually get some athletic $ for college. and for most of those gifted players, it won't be a full ride. i've never forgotten that. and every club i've been associated with, although not necessarily so directly, has given parents the same honest message. so that's been my perhaps very fortunate experience...
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Post by bigfan on Apr 4, 2015 16:57:33 GMT -5
The worst of all this is that the kid's name is out there and 'famous' for a bad reason. Adults (on both sides) have put her in the middle of a fight, the very last thing anyone should want for a child. Terrible for the player....................I wonder if the parents realize this?
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Post by volleyguy on Apr 4, 2015 17:42:20 GMT -5
The worst of all this is that the kid's name is out there and 'famous' for a bad reason. Adults (on both sides) have put her in the middle of a fight, the very last thing anyone should want for a child. Terrible for the player....................I wonder if the parents realize this? They may as well put up "Not Wanted" posters with her picture on them in post offices and universities around the country. It's sad, really.
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Post by vbman100 on Apr 13, 2015 12:15:59 GMT -5
I believe this is from Susan Dimitrew, the player's mother:
Sadly, everyone took the Washington Post article, read some or all of it and drew their own conclusions, many of them wrong and based on buzzwords such as "playtime", 'lawsuit" and "benched" that had little or nothing to do with the actual events but certainly drew the reader in, and generated an immense amount of unwanted media attention and a flurry of articles by people who never talked to any of the sources.
The post article while not entirely incorrect, paraphrased some things and then people jumped to the wrong conclusion. For example. I did write to the coach that my daughter was "Devastated", but this was in response to an email from the coach telling me my daughter was no longer a member of the team and that it would be better if she not come to practice. My e-mail had nothing to do with play time. Turns out the coach had mistakenly thought my daughter quit the team (she most definitely did not) and then reported this news to all of the players and parents on the team before ever speaking to her or her parents. The coach made some poor decisions, said and did some things he should not of and apologized to Audrey for them, however we thought it best for her to move on, not only for Audrey, but for the coaches and the remaining team members. We felt Audrey was being forced from the team, for what reasons, I am still not sure.
At the coaches suggestion, we found another team who was not only willing, but excited to have Audrey play for them. She immediately began practicing with the new team and we thought that would be the end of it, and perhaps it had worked out for the best. No one ever imagined that the league would stand in the way of the transfer, after-all they have the power to let her change teams, and we thought they would be advocates for the athletes not just the clubs. We remain completely baffled by the entire situation.
I am not a helicopter parent, I have two daughters both of whom have played club and or middle and high school volleyball for 5+ years. During that time I can only recall one instance when I have EVER talked to any of their coaches about anything to do with playtime, lineups etc. I have taught my children to speak for themselves. A fact that should be evident in Audrey's interview on Fox & Friendshttp://insider.foxnews.com/2015/04/03/teen-volleyball-player-served-lawsuit-after-getting-benched. There does come a point however, where a parent certainly does need to intervene.
As to filing a lawsuit, wee were simply trying to get an injunction that would allow Audrey to play for the remainder of the season. We were not suing the club and there was no monetary suit. The league, CHRVA a part of USAVolleyball, is a private organization, so nothing they do is public despite the fact that they oversee roughly 8,600 teen athletes. I am certain that we are not alone in our issue, however we have no way of knowing how many other children have faced similar situations as all of their records are private. Why does the league find it necessary to hold the athlete, usually a teen to their end of the contract but not the club? Why is it OK for a coach to tell you anything to get you to join their team, but once you are on board they don't have to live up to their end of the bargain? Why force a teen to stay on a team where she was simply not a good fit, when she can go to another team and have an enjoyable and productive season?
Also, this was NOT an elite team. This was a club team coached by two dad's and comprised of a bunch of girls who are likely not going to be playing in college. Volleyball WAS an avenue for my daughter to play, socialize, improve her volleyball skills and keep in shape for the upcoming high school season. We are not delusional and neither is she, she will never be playing for Penn State or the equivalent, perhaps she had thought of playing on a lower level college team, or even just playing club in college for fun. It's true that the Sophmore and Junior year are important years for club volleyball players looking to play in college, but it's also an important year for girls like my daughter who are simply hoping to transition from JV to Varsity in high school.
Susan Dimitrew
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Post by rainbowbadger on Apr 13, 2015 13:05:53 GMT -5
...You mean the internet overreacted?
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Post by gigibear on Apr 13, 2015 14:58:26 GMT -5
Something hinkey going on....and the post article seems light years away from the facts compared to those written by parent. Wondered who was interviewed for that piece.
If it is as the mom has written, seems there should be an exception made by the league which has deemed itself judge, jury and warden.
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