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Post by downtheline on Feb 7, 2017 0:39:15 GMT -5
Am I old fashion? Or is it generally acceptable for your former high school coach to date you once your off to college?
The rapid expansion of the beach game has a flood of new "experts" arriving on scene to coach clubs & beach training without much vetting.
I wouldn't want my daughter being pursued by a former coach, and would most likely show them the woodshed if any attempt was made to date her.
I realize in our country "18 is legal adult", but knowing later a young coach had plans once the date passed is creepy.
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Post by lesmizuno on Feb 7, 2017 12:18:34 GMT -5
It is creepy. If there is any coach that takes him/her self remotely serious they should know better than to pursue an ex-athlete. Regardless of the legality of age, it is inappropriate. I believe there are "unwritten rules" of waiting two years after coaching the athlete...blah blah blah. It was on a VERY old NFHS or IMPACT certification. (I can't remember) I'm not sure how the parents would handle it, but its likely any reputation (other than creep) would go directly down the drain.
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Post by guest2 on Feb 7, 2017 12:30:12 GMT -5
It is creepy. If there is any coach that takes him/her self remotely serious they should know better than to pursue an ex-athlete. Regardless of the legality of age, it is inappropriate. I believe there are "unwritten rules" of waiting two years after coaching the athlete...blah blah blah. It was on a VERY old NFHS or IMPACT certification. (I can't remember) I'm not sure how the parents would handle it, but its likely any reputation (other than creep) would go directly down the drain. Its sad how common this is. Almost as bad is if you visit the indoor forums and hear how many apologists there are for it. |
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Post by downtheline on Feb 7, 2017 12:36:10 GMT -5
That's one reason I posted here. Over there the Nutler supporters would be out in droves.
That guy creeped on my daughter from 14-17's. "I really like her play" would come from those beedy eyes. Get the F outta here predator...
I already have seen example in the beach side and it may be more vulnerable in this rapid growth cycle.
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Post by guest2 on Feb 7, 2017 12:47:36 GMT -5
That's one reason I posted here. Over there the Nutler supporters would be out in droves. That guy creeped on my daughter from 14-17's. "I really like her play" would come from those beedy eyes. Get the F outta here predator... I already have seen example in the beach side and it may be more vulnerable in this rapid growth cycle. Raising girls is so difficult. Stuff like this is everywhere. Beach is not just newer, its also a sport where athletes are more vulnerable, lots of 1 to 1 work, bikinis etc. If the coaching associations had any integrity they would vote in rules against it. I am sure there are situations where its innocuous, college coach meets athlete he coached 10 years after and they hit it off, but is there enough value in the 1% of cases that happen that way to make prohibiting it problematic? Why not say to coaches, "Coaching in high school and college is a privilege and the sacrifice you have to make for that is to not sleep with women you once coached." I do't think thats a lot to ask. There are a lot of predators it wouldn't stop, but maybe some would refrain from it. |
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Post by Wolfgang on Feb 7, 2017 14:08:34 GMT -5
But if they're in love...
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Post by gobruins on Feb 8, 2017 4:17:16 GMT -5
That's one reason I posted here. Over there the Nutler supporters would be out in droves. That guy creeped on my daughter from 14-17's. "I really like her play" would come from those beedy eyes. Get the F outta here predator... I already have seen example in the beach side and it may be more vulnerable in this rapid growth cycle. Raising girls is so difficult. Stuff like this is everywhere. Beach is not just newer, its also a sport where athletes are more vulnerable, lots of 1 to 1 work, bikinis etc. If the coaching associations had any integrity they would vote in rules against it. I am sure there are situations where its innocuous, college coach meets athlete he coached 10 years after and they hit it off, but is there enough value in the 1% of cases that happen that way to make prohibiting it problematic? Why not say to coaches, "Coaching in high school and college is a privilege and the sacrifice you have to make for that is to not sleep with women you once coached." I do't think thats a lot to ask. There are a lot of predators it wouldn't stop, but maybe some would refrain from it. The problem with this approach: You can argue that you have to forego the right to date these women if you want the privilege of coaching in high school. What about the rights of the women? What "privilege" do they have that requires them to forego dating any person they want? This idea that women are hapless victims in the dating scene, is one of the most sexist things I have ever heard. Do you really believe that women are not capable of deciding for themselves, whom they want, or don't want, to date? |
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Post by guest2 on Feb 8, 2017 7:01:25 GMT -5
Raising girls is so difficult. Stuff like this is everywhere. Beach is not just newer, its also a sport where athletes are more vulnerable, lots of 1 to 1 work, bikinis etc. If the coaching associations had any integrity they would vote in rules against it. I am sure there are situations where its innocuous, college coach meets athlete he coached 10 years after and they hit it off, but is there enough value in the 1% of cases that happen that way to make prohibiting it problematic? Why not say to coaches, "Coaching in high school and college is a privilege and the sacrifice you have to make for that is to not sleep with women you once coached." I do't think thats a lot to ask. There are a lot of predators it wouldn't stop, but maybe some would refrain from it. The problem with this approach: You can argue that you have to forego the right to date these women if you want the privilege of coaching in high school. What about the rights of the women? What "privilege" do they have that requires them to forego dating any person they want? This idea that women are hapless victims in the dating scene, is one of the most sexist things I have ever heard. Do you really believe that women are not capable of deciding for themselves, whom they want, or don't want, to date? No one has the right to date someone that doesn't want to date them. In this scenario the women's right to date whoever they want is not infringed on, but if ex-coaches decide to date their ex-players they simply can't coach anymore. Do I really believe it is difficult for women, or anyone, to make objective decisions regarding a person who holds such a high degree of power over them? Sure. |
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Post by haze on Feb 8, 2017 14:19:10 GMT -5
IMO it doesn't matte the "rights" of the woman in this scenario. That isn't even the issue. The coach needs to draw that line, plain and simple, end of story.
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Post by gobruins on Feb 9, 2017 5:45:42 GMT -5
The problem with this approach: You can argue that you have to forego the right to date these women if you want the privilege of coaching in high school. What about the rights of the women? What "privilege" do they have that requires them to forego dating any person they want? This idea that women are hapless victims in the dating scene, is one of the most sexist things I have ever heard. Do you really believe that women are not capable of deciding for themselves, whom they want, or don't want, to date? No one has the right to date someone that doesn't want to date them. In this scenario the women's right to date whoever they want is not infringed on, but if ex-coaches decide to date their ex-players they simply can't coach anymore. Do I really believe it is difficult for women, or anyone, to make objective decisions regarding a person who holds such a high degree of power over them? Sure. The subject being discussed is former coaches, not current coaches. |
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Post by BuckysHeat on Feb 10, 2017 16:03:15 GMT -5
Not justifying anything but just throwing out there that Russ Rose married one of his players. She was of course graduated from college when they got married so it may not be completely similar. But he was her coach for 4 years before he became her "former" coach
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Post by montechello on Feb 10, 2017 16:29:41 GMT -5
Not justifying anything but just throwing out there that Russ Rose married one of his players. She was of course graduated from college when they got married so it may not be completely similar. But he was her coach for 4 years before he became her "former" coach What has Russ's son, Chris, been doing since Arizona State cut him from its staff last fall? |
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Post by guest2 on Feb 10, 2017 16:38:06 GMT -5
Not justifying anything but just throwing out there that Russ Rose married one of his players. She was of course graduated from college when they got married so it may not be completely similar. But he was her coach for 4 years before he became her "former" coach Why does success mean he is less likely to be morally compromised. Lots of great coaches and players turned out to be despicable human beings. I dont know if the Chris Rose allegations are true but "far from the tree" and all |
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Post by Hawk Attack on Feb 11, 2017 0:13:24 GMT -5
Not justifying anything but just throwing out there that Russ Rose married one of his players. She was of course graduated from college when they got married so it may not be completely similar. But he was her coach for 4 years before he became her "former" coach Why does success mean he is less likely to be morally compromised. Lots of great coaches and players turned out to be despicable human beings. I dont know if the Chris Rose allegations are true but "far from the tree" and all Are you suggesting Russ Rose is a despicable human being? |
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Post by gobruins on Feb 11, 2017 5:16:40 GMT -5
Not justifying anything but just throwing out there that Russ Rose married one of his players. She was of course graduated from college when they got married so it may not be completely similar. But he was her coach for 4 years before he became her "former" coach Russ Rose is hardly the only "big name" coach to marry a former player. Just off the top of my head, there is John Cook and Jim Moore. I am sure there are plenty more. |
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